She said “I like working with you.”
Nothing strange or unusual in that statement, it is almost has innocuous has “Hello, how are you doing?”, or in my way of thinking noise. Noise; yes well to understand this you need to know that people say things for only two reasons, good reasons that is.
You believe that the hearer needs to hear it. Comforting words are in this category.
Or you need to say the words, and in this we can expound to you need the hearer to hear what you have to say.
Anything else is just noise.
So what happens if you need to say something and the hearer does not want to hear it. Well the words become noise to them and typically your feelings are hurt or you become confused about the hearers attitude. Both of these responses may lead to anger in us if we do not find a way dealing with it.
Back to subject, the statement made to me did not appear to me as noise so it left it in one of the two good reasons to be said.
Was I unintentionally or unconsciously showing discomfort or even uncertainty in the position I was in. I do think so. I am well used to be in strange and even overwhelming situations, I would go as far as stating I look for these and then place myself in them.
So if it was not noise and I did not need to hear it did the other person need to state it or need me to hear it?
I felt no disquiet between us and while, and I believe most people would take this to be a given that, the statement was just a way of building a positive atmosphere between the two of us, I do not see this as being true.
True. That of course is a topic for another post.
In the end I will never know what was meant unless the person feels the need to expand on the statement. If it was just noise then they will have forgotten it and would be astounded at my being able to not only remember the words but being able to put so much thought into it.
If they believed I needed to hear it or even if they wanted me to hear it the event as occurred as they needed and is finished.
If they needed to say these words it will probably reemerge in another way.
For myself I believe the sayer needed to say it and I will be waiting to see how it resolves itself. For now…